The Effectiveness of a Behavior Contract

Blaine — Mon, 25 Jan 2010 05:21:34 +0000

If you’ve been browsing through my site you would’ve caught onto the importance I believe a well structured reward plan has in shaping behavior. A behavior contract can play a very effective role in any reward plan (along with reward charts and a token economy).

A behavior contract can be be a useful behavior modification tool when other methods aren’t working so well, and it can give your child a sense of being involved in a serious, grown-up process. This can be flattering to many children as it shows them that you are prepared to enter into a negotiation with them, and sign off on your agreement.

Why a Behavior Contract Can Work So Well

A behavior contract allows your child to negotiate the “terms of the contract”. This is particularly useful for older children.
The contract spells it out in black-and-white what is expected and what will be awarded.
It allows your child to feel more in control of their behavior choices.
The behavior contract can help structure the behavior patterns of your child and gives them a great opportunity for self-management.
As with any good reward plan, such as using reward charts for children, a behavior contract teaches delayed gratification.
Because the contract clearly defines what is expected of your children, family tension and arguments over on-going behavioral problems tend to dissipate.

How to Use Behavior Contracts

Be clear as to your requirements and when they must be met. But remember if your child negotiates reasonable changes, then apply them – that’s the art of negotiation after all, and gives your child the required sense of control.
Fill out the behavior contract and have both you and your child sign off on it. This act of signing off can really pass on the importance, expectation and “seriousness” of the contract.
Follow through, be specific, be consistent, be positive, and don’t overwhelm your child with type and number of expected behavior changes. In fact most of the rules regarding reward charts for children will directly apply to using a behavior contract.
Whatever agreements have been made regarding the adherence to behavior contracts should ALWAYS be followed through.

Examples of Behavior Contract Agreements

“I will brush my teeth every morning and night” / “We will provide a movie night at the end of every week”
“I will put all my dirty clothes in the clothes hamper as soon as I change” / “We will allow an extra 10 minutes of playtime before bed”
“When I feel like hitting my brother, I will walk away to another room until I calm down” / “We will provide your choice of dinner and dessert once a week”
“I will dress myself in the morning” / “We will provide an extra 5 minutes of story-time when it’s time for bed”
As you can see these types of agreements are specific and achievable. Of course the behavior you wish to tackle will be specific to your child and family situation.

The beauty of a behavior contract is that they can be easily adapted and used for younger children as well as older children. The examples above would be more suited to younger children but the contracts can be as sophisticated as you would like (or what is appropriate). For example with an older child the agreement might be “I will complete all my school assignments and hand them in on time during this semester” and your response may be “We will provide a PlayStation game of choice at the the end of semester”.

Good luck with your endeavors, and I would love to hear about any of your behavior contract successes.

Using a Behavior Contract to Reduce Arguments

Blaine — Tue, 01 Jun 2010 17:52:34 +0000

Have your children ever tried the old “but you said….” routine? I’m sure it’s a stock standard attempt for many children (including mine!) to manipulate us in some way, and I’m also sure that for many kids it has worked on occasion – let’s face it parents are mostly very busy people and it can happen that we occasionally forget what we actually did say, or sometimes we might even agree to something in a weak moment where we didn’t think it through.

In those situations it’s easy for us to “second-guess” ourselves when our children start with “but you said…” Usually this confrontation will either end up in us giving in to our child or having an argument with our child about what we may or may not have said!…This is where a well thought out Behavior Contract may come in handy.

Bring on the Behavior Contract

When a behavior contract is implemented a set of expected behaviors or goals are clearly stated, along with any associated rewards. As soon as you hear the words “but you said…” you can simply pull out the contract and refer to it together (avoiding the smugness you may feel ).

An example that may sound familiar to many might go something like this:

“..but you said if I do my homework tonight we can have take-out” and when you both refer to the behavior contract it might actually state “if you do your homework every night this week, we can have take-out on the week-end”.

Hopefully this is where the argument will end. Especially if you both initially set up the behavior contract with a good spirit and intent. You’ve both signed off on the particulars of the contract, you both are willing to hold each other to their obligations of the contract, and you’ve taken the effort to make the whole process of setting up the behavior contract feel “important”.

Sure your child might become sullen when you pull out the contract and show where they’re wrong in their assertion “but you said…”, but if you do it without the “I told you so” attitude and maybe with some gentle encouragement, they will soon stop.

After all you’ve entrusted them with the responsibility of formulating, negotiating and signing an “official” document. In those moments where arguments are brewing, remind your children of this, remind them of their reward, and offer them your positive encouragement.