When child behavior experts speak about changing behavior, often they lapse into a philosophical discussion about modifying behavior. At times these discussions, while valuable, can become generalizations about behavior change, rather than discussing the specifics about individualized tools to change behavior.

Many parents that I speak with “get” why behavior modification is important, they understand many of the principles involved, they recognize that there are healthy as well as unhealthy ways to go about it, and they can see how positive behavior change can benefit their children and themselves.

Sometimes when parents are searching for a solution for their child’s bad or inappropriate behavior they can get so caught up in the various arguments and counterarguments about parenting methods, techniques and tips that you can almost hear them crying out:

“I just want to know what tools are out there to help me change my child’s behavior?”

Effective tools to help change behavior

Any information and knowledge that can make you a better parent is fantastic, but sometimes parents have heard enough and just want a tangible product or tools for behavior change, that they can start using right away.

The tools and strategies for behavior change that I have used successfully with my children include reward charts, behavior contracts, token economy, sticker charts, lucky dip rewards, and “I Did It!” certificates. While I sell some of these fantastic ready-to-go products on this website, with a bit of creativity, materials and effort you can make your own easily enough. Or you can get some of our great free reward charts here.

You can check out the articles below for further ideas on tools to change behavior.

Reward or discipline your children anywhere…anytime with our specially designed token economy!

Fundamentally a Token Economy is a form of behavior modification whereby tokens are rewarded for appropriate behavior and the tokens may be cashed in for valued rewards.

Just think about it… your child listens well ….. does what they’re told …. acts kindly towards others …… plays well with their brother……. shares their toys … packs up after themselves …. in fact whenever they behave well they earn a token, they collect them, and they get to spend their tokens on valued rewards.

Maybe you are already using a token economy system. Your child does their chores and they earn their pocket money at the end of the week. If we break this token economy down further we can see that there is an expectation on your child, your child fulfils this expectation and then rewarded for doing so. Not so different from the adult world right? We operate in our own token economy – we work, or we keep house, or we choose to be stay-at-home parents. We complete these commitments and we earn money through wages, allowances, advances, benefits or whatever else and the reward is we get to accumulate, spend or donate this money however we choose – in every sense this should be considered a token economy.

Why Using a Token Economy is So Great

• A great way to improve behavior… positively!
• A token economy system can be extremely beneficial to our kids.
• It can help kids focus on improving behavior.
• Using a token economy system gives kids the power to “own” their behavior both good and bad.
• Teaches the importance of delayed gratification.
• Allows kids to be responsible for their behavior.
• A token economy is a great strategy to use with older children, as well as the younger age groups.
• Is a proven effective strategy for parents…
• … and using a token economy is simply great fun!

Using behavior contracts along with a token economy can also be a great guide and focus to both you, as a parent, and your child. These behavior contracts allow us to be very specific about expectations. It can be a great opportunity to sit down together and brainstorm about expected behaviour, unacceptable behaviour, and about what rewards may be on offer. They can be a fantastic way of laying a foundation for the use of a token economy. Behavior contracts require acknowledgment by parent and child (our behavior contracts require a signature by both which can make the behavior contract more “official”). These work well with both older and younger kids.

A token economy is great for us parents as well. It gives us a chance to really watch out for our child’s good behaviour and immediately reward it. I’m a parent and I know how often my children can be annoying, inappropriate, or rude and sometimes I’m so focused on bad behavior that I neglect or don’t even notice their good behavior – their small acts of kindnesses, their sharing, their thoughtfulness or simply their doing as they’re told. By using a token economy we can reward such behavior immediately. We can improve our child’s behavior, manage the tension of the household and most importantly we can help to improve our child’s self-esteem.

If you’ve browsed around our website you might have come across our reward chart rules which in the main also apply to our Star Coins token economy and behavior contracts. The key to using a token economy is to Be Positive, Be Consistent, Be Realistic and Be Fair.

If you use your imagination there are many ways that you can implement a token economy. You can make your own tokens, or tickets, or you can even cut out paper shapes to hand out. You can also make your own behavior contracts. Of course here at RewardingKids.com we have our very own Star Coins token economy for sale.

We have designed and developed our token economy to be great quality, durable, fun and plentiful (130 quality, plastic tokens can go a long way!)

RewardingKids Token Economy System

Fundamentally reward charts (or behavior charts) are tools for behavior management or behavior modification whereby a child is awarded stickers or other rewards for behaving well. This is a process of positive reinforcement and can be a very powerful tool in changing behavior. Reward charts won’t magically fix all bad behavior or make our children suddenly start behaving well, but think of it as adding a powerful weapon to your parenting arsenal.

Reward charts for children can help to:

• encourage new behaviors or habits
• change or shape behavior
• stop bad or inappropriate behavior
• improve existing behaviors
• change habits
• introduce healthy habits
• set goals
• …and so on.

Why our reward charts are unique and so powerfully effective

• Our reward charts come in a variety of different themes suitable for boys and girls of most ages up to the pre-teen adolescent (different strategies may need to be considered for the older children such as a token economy and behavior contracts).

• Your children can write their name on the behavior chart, and in the case of the 20 stickers charts they have a special space to write what they’re working on (the behavior or task), also their bronze reward, their silver reward and their “big” gold reward. We believe this really gives a sense of “ownership” over the rewards chart, and it offers an on-going incentive or rewards in smaller stages before they reach the ultimate goal of the behavior chart.

• Our reward charts for children vary in the number of sticker spaces to be filled, according to the age and development of the child. For example some reward charts need 10 reward stickers to complete, while others need 20 reward stickers. The reward charts are designed so that a child will experience a smaller reward earlier in the use of the chart, before an increased ’stretch’ to reach the ultimate reward. After tasting this early success, children are more likely to concentrate their efforts on reaching the final goal of their rewards chart.

• With the 10 sticker reward chart a child will reach the Silver star after 5 reward stickers and the Gold star after 10 reward stickers. Generally these reward charts are used with toddlers and younger children and the “reward” of gaining a smiley sticker or a star sticker is all that is required. Of course other rewards may be offered on reaching the silver and gold stars, and these could be recorded and stored separately.

• With the 20 sticker reward charts, the child will reach the Bronze star (and a smaller reward) after 5 reward stickers, the Silver star (and another smaller reward) after 10 reward stickers, and the Gold star (and ultimate or “big” reward) after 20 reward stickers.

• We have found through hours and hours of testing and relentless trial and error that the format of our reward charts (smaller reward, leading to smaller reward, leading to larger reward) offers a fantastic chance to maintain a child’s interest in the reward chart. Of course this leads to a greater chance of success for your children.

Using your reward charts successfully

• Our Behavior Charts are designed to have your child be involved in all aspects of using the behavior chart.

• This can include brainstorming for possible rewards (with your guidance and final say of course).

• Discuss with your child (when calm and controlled) possible behavioral goals that may need to be addressed or other such goals (for example, improved homework practices, brushing teeth etc).

• Get your child to write their name, their goal behavior (or task, etc) and their rewards for completing the behavior chart, on the laminate coated reward chart with the marker included in the reward chart pack.

• When your child does what they have committed to (as written on their rewards chart), award them with a sticker to place on the rewards chart. It’s a great visual incentive for your child to see their progress towards their goal reward.

• When your child has filled in all the reward stickers spots on the reward chart, then they can be awarded their reward. They have earned it!

• At this stage the reward charts can be wiped cleaned, the reward stickers removed, and a new reward chart can be started.

• Please consider also that the more involvement children have in the preparation toward the use of the reward charts, the more of a sense of “ownership” your child will have over the reward chart or behavior chart and the process of using it. We have found that this can often be the missing link leading toward the success of using reward charts. (Of course this involvement may be determined by your child’s age and level of development)

Reward charts are not the answer to all of your parental challenges (and shame on anyone who says they will be) but used wisely and well, and coupled with effective praising, they really can offer us parents a proven effective, and very powerful strategy of behavior management. If you choose to buy our reward charts, or if you decide to make your own kids charts, remember the key is always to Be Positive, Be Consistent, Be Realistic and Be Fair. (Check out our reward chart rules)

One of the most accurate things that I’ve ever heard anyone say about parenting is that it is “one huge, incredible roller-coaster!” It really is such an up and down, day-to-day existence that is influenced by everything from TV and popular culture, through to peers and friends, through to financial, health and economic situations. Lets not make any bones about it, parenting is difficult….and incredible.

How can parenting be so wonderful, fantastic, uplifting, rewarding, fun, awe-inspiring, exhilarating….and at the same time so depressing, challenging, crushing, heart-wrenching, overwhelming and difficult?

It’s a big and extremely important job, and one where we need all the help we can get. Whether that help comes from family and friends, child health professionals, books or even websites such as Rewardingkids.com, it all counts, right? If we can get it right (or mostly right), I believe we give our children every opportunity to become well-adjusted, valuable members of society.

I’ve told plenty of people before that parenting is the one of the most important responsibilities one can have, and have more than once been told to not be so “over-dramatic”. But think about it, our children grow up to become leaders, workers, teachers, innovators, healers, scientists, parents…and custodians of our planet and our future. And after them, their children. It sounds dramatic but it is how it is. Thinking along these lines can really bring home the importance of good and positive parenting.

Being a better parent starts with the desire to be a better parent. Then follows structure and strategy. I hope you find something of value throughout this website. Good luck.

Behavior modification is an easy concept to grasp, but it tends to be much more difficult to actually put behavior modification techniques into practice. Actually to be more accurate, I should add that it can be much more difficult to effectively put these techniques into action.

For example using the method of timeout as a technique for behavior modification is very easy to implement. ie. a child misbehaves and the parent sends them to their room for 15 minutes. In theory this is correct in that the child has been removed from a situation following bad behavior, and placed in a timeout area for a particular amount of time. In practice however, the effectiveness of this behavior modification technique will be diminished because the timeout has been poorly strategized and implemented (In this example a child’s room is filled with distractions and stimulation’s, and 15 minutes is way too long).

Behavior modification techniques such as timeout, positive discipline, modeling, loss of privileges, positive reinforcement and so on, are only as effective as we allow them to be. Parents need knowledge, consistency, support and patience to make such techniques work effectively. Often this is where the difficulty comes into beginning and maintaining such plans and techniques.

Having the desire to correct bad behavior in a healthy and positive way is a great starting point. The articles below (based on various behavior modification techniques) can hopefully give you some insights and tips to make the process as effective as possible.

Who said parenting was meant to be easy…It isn’t! Truth is parenting can be hard, challenging, heart wrenching, difficult, demoralizing, overwhelming and tiring…… But also wonderful, heart warming, joyous, awe-inspiring, satisfying and enlightening. The art of positive parenting is to foster a positive family environment where we spend more time feeling buoyant rather than demoralized, and where we can empower our children to be self-sufficient, independent and responsible. Why not tip the family balance toward wonderful and satisfying and away from difficult and demoralizing.

Sure there will be plenty of difficult moments, but when we choose to parent with love, respect, positive reinforcement, and yes, positive discipline, we can help guide our children in their choices and their patterns of behavior. Parenting should never be about making kids feel bad about themselves, but rather about allowing our kids to do good…to do right…to make mistakes without fear of ridicule or retribution…and to feel good about themselves and the choices they make.

The base concept of positive parenting

• Children will ultimately respond better to positive consequences.
• Behavior is either strengthened or weakened by it’s consequences.

Having an understanding of these proven and measurable behavioral principles allows parents to shape behavior positively, to encourage better behavior and choices, and to lessen inappropriate behavior.

Isn’t positive parenting just a cliché?

No. It’s a very real parenting choice we make that can better our children, improve their outlook and behavior, enhance our relationships with our children, and can make us feel better and more confident in our role as parents. And remember, positive parenting isn’t about raising perfect children – that just won’t happen. I like to think about it as percolating our kids in a nurturing and supportive environment, to raise good kids to become good adults.

There are many principles, strategies and tools to help guide us in our positive parenting endeavors, many of which can be found throughout this website. The concepts are simple, the practice quickly becomes natural, and the benefits for you and your children can be amazing. All that is required is the desire to be a better parent, and the consistency to make it work.

However, as a token of our appreciation for your visit to our website, we’d like to offer you a selection of free printable reward chart downloads.

I know at the time, I would’ve appreciated a quality free reward chart, such as the selection below.

These reward charts charts will load as a PDF file, so you will need to have Adobe Acrobat Reader to view and print the charts. If you don’t have Adobe Reader you can get it for free by clicking this Adobe link.

How to download a free reward chart

Simply click on one of the images below, which will open the PDF file, then click “Save a Copy” and choose where you want to save it to. From there you can open and print it as often as you like. It’s yours!

As you can see our free reward charts are quite elaborate and as such may take a while to download (depending on your Internet connection). Please be patient.

Free Reward Chart Selection

*** Handy Hint ***

Once you print your reward chart, you can make it reusable by getting it laminated. When your kids earn the sticker spot, get them to color it in using whiteboard markers. When the reward chart is completed you can wipe it off and start again!

With younger children you might consider offering them a list of rewards to choose from. Using material rewards is fine, but understand that the use of non-material rewards is just as important, and in fact can be much more of a powerful motivation. For example an activity with a parent (any time spent with parents is much more important to children than we might acknowledge).

The following is a list of suggestions only, and is limited only by your imagination. Generally material rewards should be kept small and inexpensive, but there may be times when a child is overcoming such a large hurdle that it may be appropriate to offer larger, more expensive items. Whichever rewards are chosen to use however, never underestimate how important your time is for your children.

Smaller rewards may be:

• Crayons, paper, pencils, colouring-in books.

• Bag of marbles.

• Small toy such as plastic animals, cars etc.

• Hire a DVD of your child’s choice.

• Special treat in lunchbox.

• Choosing breakfast, dessert etc.

• Special snack after school.

• Visit to the 2 dollar shop.

Special treats at home:

• Using the telephone.

• Playing dress ups.

• Having a sleepover with a friend.

• Choosing a TV program.

• Making play-dough.

• Making a cake with mum or dad.

• Planting a pot plant.

Special treats outside home:

• Staying with friends or family.

• Trip to the park.

• Picnic.

• Going to the movies.

• Riding bike.

• Visit the zoo.

• Go swimming.

• Visit the duckpond.

• Going to the beach.

Special treats with parents:

• Making biscuits or a cake.

• Extra bedtime story.

• Doing puzzle/craft activities.

• Extra playtime with mum or dad.

• Watching favorite TV program with mum or dad.

Another creative way of using the reward system is to have a lucky-dip consisting of many activities written on small separate pieces of paper which your child randomly picks, or one of many small items, such as small toys, pencils, bouncing balls, marbles, toy soldiers, hair clips, bubbles etc. A lucky-dip is always a sure-fire way to excite kids.

• Show your child that you are confident that they will behave well and achieve the results they want.

• You don’t need to wait for the perfect behavior to happen to praise your children.

• Catch your child being “good” as often as you can.

• Drawing the attention of family and friends to the chart, can also be a good way to reward children, and acknowledge their improved behavior. This will work better when younger children are involved.

• Watching for how often your child is well behaved can encourage you too. It also gets you into the habit of recognizing when your child behaves well.

• Make earning a sticker easy in the first instance. Allow your kids to experience the fun in using reward charts. Make the targets harder over time. For example, it may be that you reward sitting on the potty initially rather than actually using the potty.

• If the chart seems to stop working, re-think the targets that have been set.

• When setting the targets for the reward charts, particularly for older children, it’s important to consider that the behavior you are rewarding is your child’s interest, their participation and the effort they put in. Often it’s not helpful to focus on their performance, their talent or their ability.

• Keep promises. When you follow through on your promises, good or bad, your child learns to trust and respect you.

• If you find the reward chart isn’t working effectively for you and your child, you may need to reexamine and make adjustments to the way you are using it. You need to ensure that it maintains the interest of your child.

At a general level reward charts can be used for:

• modifying or changing behavior
• establishing new habits
• reinforcing appropriate behaviors
• encouraging habits
• improving self-esteem

More specifically reward charts can be used for such things as:

• Educational achievements – Practicing, reading, writing, learning times tables, completing homework etc.

• Daily activities – washing hands, brushing teeth, getting dressed, getting ready for bed etc.

• Developmental stages – sleeping through the night, potty training, becoming dry at night, learning to swim.

• Encouraging good behavior – using manners, tidying up, staying at the table for dinner, sharing.

• Getting rid of problem behavior: thumb sucking, hitting and kicking, tantrums (over 3’s), swearing, refusing to do chores.

In fact you are limited only by your imagination and by what may be age and developmentally appropriate for your child.